Crosslife

We will be away for the Easter weekend
With dear friends.
Much as I love that idea, there is a part of me, at this time of year, that longs for solitude to soak up the mystery of the crosslife and crossdeath of Jesus.

It is His crossdeath that comes front and centre at this time.
And rightly so.
His selfless choice to die alone so He could take all of willing humanity with Him to the realm they were created to live in, should be deeply celebrated.
And He adored for the cost that made grace free for us.

But I also think of His crosslife.
He seemed to give His away His life every day He lived here
I wonder how this compassionate Man felt, walking away from the pool of Bethsaida leaving hundreds of sick people unhealed
Did He feel emotional pain at healing only the one man?
And choose to do it anyway?
Were there times when He longed to do something spectacular to make people really see, really understand, who He was?
Knowing that those who understood would always be with Him.
But had to restrain Himself?
Were there times when He was tired and dusty and thirsty; when people saddened Him; when He would have loved to just go home to His natural family and rest there?
In the way you only can with your family.
But He didn't.
We can watch Him make right choices when He was most under siege -
In the wilderness, being tempted, at the beginning of His public journey; and in the garden, again being tempted, at the end of it.
Always, enemy tactics were to try to make Him choose the easy way; the way of humanity; the way of Self.
It is breathtaking to see that, although He had free will and could have chosen another way,
He did not.
He stuck with His Father's modus operandi to the end.
So He could have His children back.

Too big - too marvellous - to comprehend
And that is just the tiniest filiament of reality

What to do but worship?!